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  • Collier Landry

Rest Easy Blondie w/ Kelsi German, Terra Newell & Lenora Claire - All Dogs Go To Heaven - MPM #62

On October 30, 2022, Collier said goodbye to the light of his life, constant companion, and chihuahua child Blondie. She was four months shy of her 18th birthday. While loss is something Collier has dealt with his entire life, this one has cut deep. In this special episode of Moving Past Murder, fellow True Crime advocates Terra Newell, Kelsi German, and Lenora Claire the importance of dogs in their lives and how our fur babies have allowed us to heal from the scars of trauma.

•We begin with an interview with Kelsi German, whose sister Libby is one of two victims of the 2017 Delphi murders. After a 5 year investigation, suspect Richard Allen was arrested on October 31, 2022, in connection with the murder of Libby and her friend Abigail Williams. The interview is interrupted by Kelsi's dog, and Collier shares his recent loss of his beloved Blondie.

•We segue into a discussion with Lenora Claire, the "Erin Brockovich of Stalking", who shares how dogs have played a massive part in her and other SA and stalking survivors' journey toward healing.

•Terra Newell, the better half of the Survivor Squad podcast, shares how her dog Cash helped save her life from her attacker "Dirty John" Meehan.

Follow Kelsi & justice for Libby and Abby on Twitter: @libertyg_sister

Follow Lenora on Instagram: @lenoraclaire

Follow Terra on Instagram: @terranewell

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MPM EP 62 - Rest Easy Blondie

Collier Landry: [00:00:00] Dogs are very important. I believe all dogs go heaven.

Kelsi German: Yeah, absolutely. They definitely do. Like I, there's nowhere else for them to go. Like I feel like dogs are better than people most of the time. A hundred percent. I love, I have the best therapist. She is great, but my dog has heard more of me crying and like been there for me more than any therapist or any person.

Will be able to be there for me and like they don't [00:00:30] care like what you're saying or what you're going through, but they like sit there and like wag their little nub. Or if they have a tail wag, their tail is not so he just wiggles his butt. They're so sweet and he just like, he sits there and like makes you

Collier Landry: happy.

Testimony continued. Today in the most notorious criminal trial in Richland County history. Dr. John Boyle is accused of killing his wife Noreen, and burying her body in the basement of his new home in Erie, Pennsylvania. The 12 year [00:01:00] old son finally took the stand as I

Kelsi German: heard a scream. I heard a thud was about this loud.

Collier Landry: We had the jury find the defendant guilty. When I was 12 years old, my testimony sent my father to prison for murdering my. This podcast serves as a type of therapy and reconciliation for myself, and it is my hope that it helps anyone who has experienced deception, betrayal, and dark trauma. I'm Collier Landry, and this is Moving Past Murder.[00:01:30]

Hey, movers. Welcome back to another episode of Moving Past Murder. I'm your host, Collier Landry. And what's going? No home. Oh. Uh, Happy Friday, everyone. Um, I'm not gonna lie, this has been a really, really tough week for me. Um, as those of you that follow me on Instagram, you know, I do lives every week, but this week I, I did not do my live, [00:02:00] uh, I just, you know, I just didn't want to hear one thing and, um, that was.

Where's Blondie? Um,

I'm really sorry to say, uh, to tell you guys that my chihuahua, who was literally the light of my life, and I have had her since she was 10 weeks old. Um, she was four months shy of her 18th birthday. Uh, she [00:02:30] crossed over the Rainbow bridge on Sunday, October. You know, I have Blondie in my life for almost 18 years.

And to put that in perspective, that is about six and a half years longer than I had my own mother in my life. So she was a long time companion, and she was just the light of my world and for those of my friends that [00:03:00] were privileged enough to know. and saw how I was with her, they would say the same. And you know, for those of you that watch on Instagram, I always, always posting videos and photos with her and she was just really like the light of my world.

So, um, I, I'm actually surprised. I, I, you know, it probably took me honestly about 40 times of rehearsing this intro to this episode, to not cry cuz I've been bawling for like four days straight. Um, [00:03:30] she just, uh, Uh, you know, it's hard with animals because I, I think for me, I, um, you know, when I was a child going through, you know, the murder of my mother and the eventual arrest of my father, when I was taken outta my home, I, you know, was not allowed to take my dog with me.

And child services said, Hey, we'll come back and get your dog. And I never saw my dog. , and that is something that I [00:04:00] probably, you know, when I talk about trauma on this show and I, I talk about, you know, you know, my instances from childhood and my experiences, I think that that is something that I still, I don't know if I've ever really recovered from, is losing my dog at such a, at such a critical time in my life.

And I know I've talked about this before and I, you know, it's just never easy and it. The heart, one of the hardest decisions I've made. [00:04:30] Um, but look, I had her since she was 10 weeks old, um, since she was a little, little baby. And I just, you know, I, she had an amazing life and up until probably last couple of days before she crossed over.

I just, um, you know, she was still had a really high quality of life and even though she was almost 18, [00:05:00] you know, we would still take walks a half a mile walk in the morning every single day. She was still spunky, and that's what makes us so hard is that I watched videos of her just even a week ago just being spunky and then just to just.

Lose her like that. It's, um, so quickly. But I'm so grateful for all the time that I got to spend with her. And, and you know, Blondie came into my life when I [00:05:30] was dating a girl, and, uh, we had another dog named Elvis that she had gotten who was also a Chihuahua and Elvis had a slew of health problems.

Elvis passed away a little over five and a half years ago. I, she wanted another dog and for a friend for Elvis, and I had another ex-girlfriend that had gotten to Chihuahua and after about a week she called me and she was a cat person and. Uh, you know, I, uh, [00:06:00] I got a phone call from her cause I thought, Oh God, she's a cat person.

She got this chihuahua, this is not gonna end well. And she was crying and she's like, I just, the dog cries and, you know, the cat's not eating. And, you know, uh, she, she was just really upset. And I said, Pamela, do you want me to take her? And she said, Yes. And, Uh, that is my dear friend. Still to this day, I mean, Pamela and I dated 20 years ago, , uh, still a friend to this day.

I actually messaged her right to let her know that I was putting Blondie [00:06:30] down. I thank you to Pamela Willis for bringing Blondie into my life, um, because she was the best dog. She really was. She had an amazing life and I. I can't stress that enough. And I, And look, this is a, this is a episode that really kind of diverts off from what my normal topic is.

Uh, I'm gonna bring on some friends. I'm gonna bring my dear friend Tara Newell, who was actually there with me to help me put Blondie down. My dear friend, uh, Nora Claire, who has a little min pin. About [00:07:00] Blonie size and then a new friend, Kelsey German, whose sister was murdered in Delphi, Indiana, and with her friend Abby.

They just recently had an arrest in this case, but she talks to me about her dog and, and a dream that she had right after her sister was murdered. You know, we just all just kinda share our little dog stories in this episode. So I wanted to just sort of share this in the memory of my dear Chihuahua Blondie.

She was a Pisces like me. She was born on March 5th, 2005, which. Insane to [00:07:30] me. But I do wanna get to this week's listener question of the week, which, uh, is actually just a comment from YouTube, uh, based upon the video that I posted last week, uh, about the letter from prison from my father when the, he was in his first year saying, Get me out of, out of this nightmare that he, of course created by murdering my mother.

And she says, This is Anna Santa Cruz. She says, As a survivor of a narc from a narcissistic psycho, I watch a lot of true crime to help me understand how their brain [00:08:00] works and to reassure myself that I wasn't going crazy. Like you said, they can convince anyone that the sky is pink and that the ocean is yellow.

I would watch him do things and I immediately ask him why he did that. He would always answer. I didn't do. And I, and always in a nonchalant matter, we would go back and forth that that way for a while until I would start to think that maybe he was right and I was just imagining it. [00:08:30] I mean, wtf, I am an intelligent person and how does that happen?

I knew he was a liar, but why lie in the first place, especially over something that was so irrelevant? I would also tell him that I was not his mother and I was not going to punish him for telling. He was never fond of that one. Well, Anna, I mean, I think the, the thing is, is that when you're dealing with someone who is narcissistic [00:09:00] or has narcissistic personality disorder or psychopathy, like, they're never gonna own up to anything they say, and they're never going to.

admit that they're, that they're lying because they've convinced themselves of it. I mean, I, I, I am, I'm reassured of this. And, and, um, I was just recently on navigating narcissism with Dr. Romney, uh, an episode with Tara Nuell. We were talking about, uh, not only my psychopathic father, but also, uh, John Mehan, Dirty John Mehan, [00:09:30] um, who was also psychopath and, uh, and just the behaviors, the, the chronic lying.

The deception of not only themselves, but then the, the confusion that they bring you in your world and it makes, it makes you feel like you're going crazy. It really, really does. And you know, it's so key. You know, even when I, when I coach people through these types of behaviors that have dealt with this and dealt with this trauma, I, I just, [00:10:00] um, you know, I say like, it does really, really help to hear from someone who has been through it because you won't recognize it.

I mean, I, I just had a dear friend reach out to me who's literally said, You know, I'm an intelligent person and I didn't, I didn't see this guy. How did I see this? How did I not see this coming? And why don't people talk about this? That's okay. My answer to this is we are talking about it now. We're talking about it, we're bringing it up in our circles of friends.

We're bringing. You know, on [00:10:30] podcasts, and hopefully by exposing this behavior and sharing our stories, look, this is what this is all about, to share our experiences. And, um, so you can't think that you're, you're, you're stupid or you've been duped by these people because they're master manipulators and you just gotta know that.

And it, and it, and my heart breaks for anyone that goes through this because the, the cycle of deception, the making you feel. . It's just nonstop. Um, [00:11:00] so yeah, so thank you Anna Santa Cruz for reaching out and sharing that. Um, again, I hope everyone had a very safe and wonderful Halloween. By the way, please enjoy this conversation that I have with my, my friend, Lenore Claire, Tara Newell and, uh, Kelsey German regarding our dogs and our experience with, with having those dogs and how they've helped us, you know, deal with trauma in our.

So I'm

Kelsi German: Kelsey German. My sister is Liberty [00:11:30] German. Um, she and her best friend Abby, were killed in February of 2017. I started advocating for them in 2018 after going to a bunch of like true crime events and I immersed myself into this community and just started sharing their story. And from there I just started.

Tons of interviews and going to different events where I could share their story with tons of people. Um, [00:12:00] and I was able to do that for five and a half years and we finally got an arrest, so that was exciting. Now I don't have to do that as much anymore, um, but I've been helping other families along the way, so I'm looking forward to doing that.

Some, um, and I continue to do this because my sister. My biggest inspiration, she just always has been, and I wanna make sure that her light stays out there. She was the smartest person I know, um, the most outgoing [00:12:30] and inspirational person I've ever met. She just loved making people happy and making sure they were smiling and having a great day.

Collier Landry: Who's that?

Kelsi German: There's a dog.

Terra Newell: Nothing


Kelsi German: let both of them in.

Collier Landry: Aww. I just lost my little [00:13:00] girl the other day.

Terra Newell: He had lost his, uh, little 17 year old Chihuahua.

Kelsi German: Yeah. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah. I would be a mess. I remember when Tara lost her dog. I was like, Oh, I have to message her cuz I, I cried for, I was like, Buddy, I can't do it. If Oliver died, I would be like, Yeah, I couldn't handle it.

Terra Newell: It was such a blessing and disguise for me because cash has been through [00:13:30] so much with me that like his time on this planet, like has just been him, like taking care of me and making sure that he's my protector and like taking care of the hell that I've been through, you know? So, Happy in the sense that he is now somewhere where he doesn't have to do that and he's just living his best life, you know?

Yeah. And then when I got Dixon, it's like, A different vibe. It's [00:14:00] like that dog Dixon, I mean, Dixon does have to take care of me at sometimes . He actually will come and sit on me and regulate my nervous system. Yeah. Um, Call your, seen it a few times. Mm-hmm. . But it's just a different, like, this dog is so happy and this dog doesn't have the trauma that cash and I had, you know?

Yeah. So that, like, I'm super grateful for. . Yeah,

Kelsi German: Allie Ollie has been [00:14:30] with me through all of this too. I think I got him in 2019, so two years after. Um, so he has been, I've always called him my gift from Libby, which is, is where he got his name, but that's a whole different story. But he, I actually had a dream of my sister, um, like maybe in January before I had even decided to get a puppy.

Way before, and it was of me and Libby on the beach, and we were sitting in these two chairs [00:15:00] and like a black dog ran out in front of me and the waves, they just kept coming and they kept getting bigger and bigger. And this dog was like up by the waves and the waves took hold of him and like dragged out into the water.

And I was terrified. I was so scared. And I stood up and I said, Lidia, are we gonna go save him? He's out in the water, like we have to go get him. And she just looked at me and smiled and said, It's going to be okay. And [00:15:30] then I got all over, like three months later and he looked exactly like the dog in my dream.

And I don't know why I remember that dream so vividly, but I can see her face still. I can still see the dogs, I still see the waves. I can see the entire thing like like a movie like in front of me. And so he's just been, he's always just been my gift from her because I just, I know that that was her showing me him and also telling me that it was gonna be okay.


Collier Landry: [00:16:00] yeah. Yeah, I feel like, like I love my little chihuahua blonie, like saved my life, you know? In a lot of ways she was just there for me, , and so in so many ways, and you know, obviously not through my trauma. Of what happened with my mother, but while I was making my film and all, everything that happened after and continues on my, as I continue on my journey, and like I said, she just passed away like four days ago, so I'm still, I'm still [00:16:30] really dealing with and yeah, she was four months shy of her 18th birthday and she had, she was, Until like the last four days of her life that she just, she almost just like went off a cliff.

It was just, she didn't go downhill. She just went, you know, And it just, it, it just, you know, even just, it really, you know, as Tara knows, it was just, it was so sudden. But I'm glad it was that cuz she wasn't slowly deteriorating. She was, she was. We used to walk a half a mile every day, [00:17:00] you know, for a little four pound chihuahua.

That's a long way, you know, sometimes a mile. Yeah. So long everybody would look in the neighborhood and be like, Oh my gosh, she's so wonderful. So, well, dogs are very important. I believe. All dogs go to heaven.

Kelsi German: Yeah, absolutely. They definitely do. Like I, there's nowhere else for them to go. Like I feel like dogs are better than people most of the time.

Hundred percent. I love, I have the best therapist. She is great, but my dog has heard more of [00:17:30] me crying and like been there for me more than any therapist or any person. Will be able to be there for me and like they don't care like what you're saying or what you're going through, but they like sit there and like wag their little nub or if they have a tail wag their tail just not so he just wiggles his butt.

No, they're so sweet and he just like, he sits there and like makes you happy.

Terra Newell: They do like the whole body

Kelsi German: shake. Yeah. Like the whole thing. He [00:18:00] just keeps going. We call 'em wiggle bug. So, Oh,

Terra Newell: I, oh my God. Okay. I feel like this is gonna, I'm, we have, we could talk about dogs forever. Um, so I'm gonna It's definitely, yeah. I'm gonna have to voice message you this

Collier Landry: So thank you both for joining. You know, I, one of the things that I think really bonds all three of us is we have this love for our [00:18:30] animals. And we, you know, even though my trauma didn't happen with Blondie, I still lost my dog when my mother was murdered, when I was yanked out of the house by Children's Services and they're, and I said, What about my dog?

They say, We'll, come back for your dog. And I never saw my dog. Right. And I think that part of that with me, you know, when I, So Blondie had a brother named Elvis. Um, they were not from the same litter, but [00:19:00] Elvis was like maybe six months older than her. And Elvis was a rut. He had an enlarged heart. He had issues with his Luxating Patel and he had trouble walking from very early.

But I kept Elvis alive, I think almost because I didn't wanna let him go. Yeah. And. And Tara, you were there. So, you know, when Blonie couldn't stand up right away to potty the other day and was almost walking, like had Elvis had walked, I said like, [00:19:30] I knew her quality and I told myself with Elvis, you know, he was still very coherent.

I mean, he tried to chase after our pit bull with his little dubby, you know, the day that I put him down in Las Fe. But he, um, he. Uh, you know, so he was cognizant, whereas Blondie seemed like she was really fading in and out of that, and then just didn't have control of her legs for what I believe is a stroke.

I just said, I'm not gonna do that to her because [00:20:00] she had lived such an amazing life for those 17 and a half years. She had no health problems. I mean, it was incredible. I had no issues with her and, you know, she was an amazing animal. And so anyways, all that to. I think that, you know, Tarara, you were there to say to me, This is the greatest gift that you can give an animal.

And because they've been such gifts in our lives, and I wanted to talk about how all of that has impacted us. You know, I know cash was a special animal for you. [00:20:30] Uh, Leno, you had another dog before Nomi, that was at a critical time for you. And I want to talk about how these animals are so amazing for us in these situ.

Terra Newell: Yeah. Well, I had one therapist that told me that if I didn't have dogs in my life at a young age and all these animals, that I might be a bipolar or borderline . Um, because. I didn't, My mom and my [00:21:00] father were workers, but I had a lot of nannies. So animals have always been my comfort and my constant affection and love.

And my parents also are not touching Philly. I've also, I've like had to learn that in my adult life, even with my animals and my dog cash, he was a brown for. Eight years of my life. He came into my life when I actually got hit [00:21:30] by a car, by a ex-boyfriend, and that was really when I needed a dog and this source of comfort, because he really became my source of healing in that instance because I didn't go to therapy back then.

I. Know how to cope. So he was really my constant safety in a sense. And later at, I believe he was like five and a half [00:22:00] years, or like around five years when I was attacked by John Mehan. Um, we've talked previously about that before on your podcast. Yeah. And so he's really been a protector all in my life.

And you know, even to the moment where he pass, It's crazy. Like earlier we were talking about how the fentanyl overdoses. My ex passed away that day from a fentanyl overdose, The [00:22:30] one that hit me with a car and cash died the same day. So it was like a cycle of like, This dog did his job to protect me, and when this person went away, he went away with them to kind of, and I'm very spiritual, so I like believe like, oh, cash went to the spirit realm to protect me from him because I don't need his energy in my life, you know, from my ex.

and then I personally just have had [00:23:00] dogs as, yes, a animals, and then now I have Dixon and he comes on my stomach and sits on my stomach and regulates my nervous system when I start to, you know, get certain emotions. He actually knows how to gauge when I need space from him or if I need him to sit on my stomach in that moment.

What does

Collier Landry: that he's, He's great with that. It's interesting because when we were talking to Kelsey German, And how she had the dream, you know, after her [00:23:30] sister Libby's murder about the dog, and then the dog came into her life. It's, it, you know, and I don't mean to be Huey Doey about this or, but I, I even had met a, a dog medium who actually of course has a podcast.

Last year and asked her about Blondie and she, she said she works with photographs. So I showed her some photos on my phone cause I only have about 500,000 of them, of Blondie on my phone. And she said, you know, she started telling me things that only [00:24:00] she would've, that only I would've known because this particular group of friends has only known me for about five years.

She was talking about things when I first got her when she was 10 weeks old with an ex-girlfriend from another ex-girlfriend. And she said she came. Not the girlfriend that you were with, but from another ex-girlfriend. Correct. And I was like, Yeah, I, How would you like, There's no way that she would know that, you know?

Yeah. And I feel that dogs are very psychically connected to us in so many ways. I mean, Lenore, I'm interested to hear what you'd say about [00:24:30] that. Yeah, and

Lenora Claire: I actually have like a weird dog psychic connection story too, and I'll, I'll get into that. My history is I grew up with dogs, a group of golden retrievers, very different than the miniatures, uh, miniature pinchers I have now.

There's just something about min pins. They call them the king of toys. They're, they're little dogs, you know, they're under 10 pounds, but they got so much personality, they're little maniacs, and they, they're just right for me, , but. My, my first spin pin, her name was Ellie, and my, my friend found her walking Hollywood Boulevard.

She's about a two year old min [00:25:00] pin. She got the name Ellie because she peed on an L magazine. So then that was how she got her name and I got her when I was 21 years old. I had a boyfriend at the time and I basically just came home with the dog, like he didn't want one. I'm just like, this is my dog, deal with it, whatever.

Um, and I will definitely say that Ellie, Ellie was, With me as I was becoming an adult. You know, 21 is such a, like a pivotal time, and I really think she saved me from making a bunch of dumb ass stupid mistakes because I was always accountable. Like I always had to come home. I always had to [00:25:30] look after her.

So I really felt that she was like my, my protector and my guardian and just, you know, really kind of kept me lying. And um, unfortunately what ended up happening with Ellie was my daddy was my best friend. He passed away. It was really just so traumatic. Uh, 33. This is, uh, 2013. And Ellie, um, she passed three months later.

And so I, I had a lot of regrets because I, I [00:26:00] wasn't ready to let her go, and so that's why I was gonna say, call her. You really did the hardest, but the most loving thing, you know? Um, I have regrets. I, I like, kept Ellie alive with IV bags, you know, I just, I, I, I wouldn't do that now. Um, I learned a lot. , she got me through my dad's passing, and then I had a really, you know, when you go through double traumas like that, you're not in a great place.

And I found people always know me from my stalking story, but [00:26:30] I also am a survivor of sex assault and domestic violence different times in my life. And my DV happened after Ellie. Like right after, because I was, I was at such a trauma place, you know, I wasn't thinking, and I, I let someone really awful into my life and, um, he assaulted me.

It was pretty bad. I, I sustained like, broken ribs on my left side. It was, it was pretty awful. And. I think it was, was it three days after my assault? I was, I was home and I was just in a, a [00:27:00] terrible place. I mean, I was like the lowest of my life. And I get this call from a guy I don't even know that well, and he is like, you know, I, I read on Facebook that your MinPin passed away, your female MinPin and mm-hmm.

I have a neighbor, an elderly woman who just passed away of a stroke and she had a young female MinPin that was with her for, for three days. I think you're meant to take her. And that's how, that's how I got know me. Um, that's how I got. So she, she came from that situation. And then, um, even worse, two days, two days after, [00:27:30] uh, she was hit by a car because she had never, I, I had her in her harness and everything, but, um, she had never been out on like a, a street.

She had only been in like a, a backyard before and she saw a bus and freaked out and got out and ran into traffic. And anyway, so this we're incredibly bonded. I got her through that. She had a broken hit, broken pelvis, um, you know, lots of surgery. You'd never know. Now, you know, she jumps, She jumps so high.

Oh yeah. I've had her for years. But Nomi really was the dog that got me [00:28:00] through all the stocking and everything. And I was gonna say the, the weird, the weird like dog, uh, psychic story, it's different than you guys. But, um, my dad had a, like a nickname for me. I was always like his little monkey. And um, right when I first got know me, I had like ordered a bunch of new.

And there was this, there was this dog toy that came along with it that wasn't like, I didn't order it and it was a little monkey. And then I looked at it and there was this other like, weird little, it's, it's like such a long [00:28:30] story, this very specific, very strange word that my dad used to call me. And sure enough, on the little tag that was the name of the monkey, And I just felt like, I was like, I was like, Oh my God, did he send this for me, for my new dog?

You know, like it was like this weird, it's like, so I never tell anyone that, cuz it sounds so like crazy. But whatever I took it to mean when I took it to mean, and I, I, it, it felt like a gift from my dad, from my new dog.

Collier Landry: Yeah. Oh, that's so

Terra Newell: sweet. I know. That's so cute.

Collier Landry: Oh, they're just the best, you know, [00:29:00] I, I think that a lot of people.

And I always used to call her my chihuahua child, as did many of my friends, right. . And you know, some people, and I get it, kids are your children, right? But for those of us that don't have, like physical children, right? We have these animals that we let into our lives. And often people, you know, will say, Well, you know, it, it's just a, it's just a, you know, it's just a dog, right?

And I feel like, It's not, it's a, it's a living [00:29:30] creature that looks up to you to take care of it. You take the responsibility, if you take that responsibility seriously, you take this responsibility to take on this, this animal, and then take care of it. And, and, uh, I think that's a really, that's like having a child.

I mean, they may not have the, they have a lot of, I feel like, human characteristics in a lot of ways because they're able to look, you know, they have left side bias and things like that. Studies have indicated, which they can read [00:30:00] emotions, hence Dixon coming to sit on your lap, you know, in your stomach when you're having anxiety from trauma and things of that nature.

I mean, I just, I just remember all the joy that Bondi bought me and, and, um, yeah,

Terra Newell: well it's like you gotta get up for your dog, you gotta get up, feed them, They remind you, you know, So it's always like you. Like kind of do it for your dog and especially if you have Australian Shepherd, they're gonna make sure you get [00:30:30] up in the morning


Collier Landry: and also dogs. You know, it's that, it's that routine when you're going through trauma and you're processing trauma routine is ultimately what really helps you, you out of that trauma. Right? And having an animal, having something that you have to care about that is outside of yourself is something that is.

key. I feel like in your healing, I mean obviously Tara, you feel that way, right? Yeah,

Terra Newell: no, I feel that way a hundred percent because when I didn't have a dog [00:31:00] after cash died, I. Literally, I would get up and then I would just walk in circles because I was like, What is the next step to the day? I don't even know.

Like I'm, Everything that was out in my routine is not there anymore, and that's when I took in a foster and I started fostering a dog. That dog was not right the right fit for me, but it started to give me a routine again, you know? And. More so angry that the dog was like [00:31:30] at the time, trying to eat my ferret, you know, where I'm not upset at least that I don't have anything to do that day, you know?

Um, and eventually I got Dixon and that was right fit for me, but I constantly had like a foster to get me back into the routine because I've been the person to always kind of had double dogs because if one dies, Like, I'll lose it, you know? Yeah. And um, I [00:32:00] really have come a long way in my trauma where I didn't lose it.

I just didn't know what to do. I just didn't know the next step of my life without a dog.

Collier Landry: Le Nora, when you work with different, you know, stalking victims or SA victims, do you find that when they have an animal, that it really helps lead them through their. Oh God.

Lenora Claire: Yeah. I mean like there's so many, uh, stalking survivors that become borderline agoraphobic.

They're afraid to leave. And you know, your dog, by nature of that, like my MinPin, I have to walk five [00:32:30] miles a day. Right. They're so incredibly helpful. Yeah. And one thing that, that also people don't realize with this kind of stuff, um, so my stalker tried to kidnap know me. Um, and so I always tell people, Uh, 33 states, you can put your animal on the restraining order, which is really important to protect them.

Um, but as far as, uh, you know, what they provide, it's, it's just unbelievable, right? What they do as far as safety and, um, in, at the height, at the worst part of my stocking, like, I didn't like to leave the house, but I realized I always felt. Safe with Nomi. [00:33:00] Like, she literally helped integrate me back into society and dealing with people.

And they're also a great buffer. You know, like if you wanna go, like, I always take her with me and it's like, if I don't wanna talk to someone, I'm just like, Oh, sorry, my dog doesn't like strangers, even though she does, you know, . It's like they just provide this like great comfort and support and, and at the flip side too, um, I'm trying to feel social, like if I'm struggling with that because of whatever's going on, it's like I just, you know, I always put Nomine in a little outfit and like everybody comes up to me and suddenly I'm just like [00:33:30] making them happy.

And I've made 10 new friends and, um, people call Nomi like the mayor of this area cuz everybody knows her. Like right now she's dressed like a unicorn, you know? Um, . But, but absolutely, and actually one of the. Um, one of the really great things, uh, you know, through my work with the district attorney here in Los Angeles is they have a canine court support unit, which is so cool.

It's, they, they really mostly work with children, like a lot of, uh, children who are survivors of sa and these dogs are [00:34:00] incredible. I mean, they're so. Loving and empathetic and trained. And actually the logo, it's like, it's um, it's a dog's paw in a little kid's hand. It's just like this, like the sweetest thing.

And there it's so incredible because, you know, and, and, and Callier you get this cuz your trauma happened when you were young. When you're a kid and you're going through what you're going through and you've gotta be in court. I can't even, it's so hard as an adult. So, um, seeing. The canine unit in court with kids is just like, it's, it's incredible.

[00:34:30] Um, I really, that's something people don't know they can ask for, but they can, uh, in most big cities, they have some kind of program like that. Yeah. That's

Terra Newell: amazing.

Collier Landry: That was definitely one of the things I think that for me, being in that space, for that limbo period of like no family, Losing my mother, losing technically my father, I mean, due to his own selfish, you know, stupidity and psychopathy.

But yeah, I would've given [00:35:00] anything to see my dog. And I, and I, and I do. I, I feel like in a lot of ways I still kind of hold onto that a little bit. I mean, I'm sure I do, I'm sure in some sort of psychoanalysis there, it'll come out. Where is that? I didn't, you know, my animal was taken away from me that I love so much.

At a time when I probably needed an animal the most, and the foster home that I was in, they didn't have any animals. They had then they had no interest in bringing that animal in, that my dog in, which was named Gowdy. And I think that, um, in [00:35:30] fact, that's why I didn't get to see him because they said we don't want him.

And I, you know, I feel like if I had had that support, I would've been, I probably would've been a lot better off, you know, when I was eventually adopted, my adopted family had a, had a gold retriever. Named Rusty and he was sweet as, um, as can be. And I can still remember to this day when my, uh, mother called me and told me about [00:36:00] Rusty, like that he was passing away.

And I was on the phone with her and she was really in a bad way and she was waiting for my, uh, my brother to come up with my father from, from, they were down in Florida on a job. And just even to this, like when I was talking to them the other day to say, you know, what had happened with Blondie and they were just, It's really tough, even to this day thinking about that, like they never got another dog again.

You know? And I feel like, you know, it, it, it, it, it's because they've just become so [00:36:30] integrated with your family and then it's, it's literally losing a loved one. Noi,

Lenora Claire: Nomi does this thing where if I cry, she looks my tears until I laugh. You know? It's like, it's, I know. It's, it's incredible. Like it's, there's just.

There's just this connection, Right? Which isn't to say that, you know, we don't connect to people, but it's just a different, it's a special connection. It's just on this whole other level, right? Yeah.

Collier Landry: And I think, again, it's, it's when you go through trauma like this, you, you want to [00:37:00] bond with something that's not because the human has harmed you.

Right? The human being has been that one that, that betrayed you, right? Laid hands on you, violated you in some way is, is, ob has this weird obsession with. and the animal is just this sort of pure light I feel. And and the dogs especially have that pure light that they just want to be there because they want to be with you.


Terra Newell: They're just natural pleasers, . [00:37:30]

Collier Landry: They're natural

Terra Newell: pleasers. Uhhuh, , natural pleasers. They're like, You know us . Yeah. They're like us. Exactly. Way more. You know, They're just like, I wanna be there for you. I wanna see you happy, you know? I wanna regulate your emotions because when I see you unhappy, that means I'm upset too.


Collier Landry: know, Tara, you, you and I were, obviously, you were with me cuz I, I needed some support and I'm like, Tara, please come here and help me. Because I was, when I saw Blondie, like I knew she was [00:38:00] going downhill and I said, you know, I want, you know, I, I'm gonna have to take her in. And, you know, it was so difficult to find a place to even take her into Eut.

Okay. And then they wanted all these extra, They wanted, you know, it cost a fortune to do it. And you explained to me that a lot of that is due because these places are overbooked or they, they've closed down because of the pandemic. And unfortunately, I mean, what did you tell me about the pandemic with dogs?

Terra Newell: Oh, that everybody decided to get [00:38:30] dogs because, hey, we're at home right now. We can take in a dog. And then everybody started going back to work and dumped them at the shelters. And even got like purebred dogs and then, Oh, I can't work, so the dogs going. So there was an influx of dogs at the shelters and now, All the shelters are kind of overflowed right now, especially in California.

And I know other states have this issue right now. I talked to Texas Humane Society in [00:39:00] Austin, Texas, and they have it overflow at dogs. It's just everywhere right

Collier Landry: now. You know, there was something you had mentioned earlier where you said even, uh, and I believe it was Kelsey was saying, These dogs don't, uh, these dogs.

That are in, that are in these situations, in the kennels, in, in these shelters, they only get 15 minutes of, of activity sometimes a day, and then they're in a cage the rest of the time. Whereas, [00:39:30] you know, even somebody who said, Well, I don't know if I can take care of 'em, I can't walk them. Even if you're letting them outside for an hour a day.

That's way more than they're gonna get in a shelter. Well,

Terra Newell: it also even depends on how many volunteers that they have at the shelter. A dog may not even get out a day. Like sometimes the dog will get on a little walk a day, but most of them are like pooping and peeing in their kennel because they're not coming out of that kennel unless they have volunteers for the shelters as well.

And then [00:40:00] there's certain dogs, like people will also drop their dogs off the shelter to get euthanized because they can't afford the euthanasia or you know, to euthanize their dog and you. The process you went through, everybody wanted to charge around like $600 and shout out. Yeah, that would, that would've been true.

Yeah. Shout out to like Sherman Oaks veterinarian, where um, they took her in, they charged, [00:40:30] um, Yeah. They were reasonable. They were reasonable. They were reasonable. Even that people can't. Something reasonable too. And so they'll put their dogs back at the shelter. And then there's a lot of these red alert dogs that have like cancer tumors and people also wanna drop those dogs out, which it's, it's kind of a controversy because it's like people drop them off.

So to get euthanized and then, you know, rescues will see that and be [00:41:00] like, Oh, we wanna save them and. Rescues do have resources to save them, um, because they, you know, specialize in that type of dog, where that vet may have been like not aware of certain things that they could do or whatnot. So it's, it's just a conflicted situation right now.

Yeah, I was saying

Lenora Claire: the, the only fight I get into with Henry, and I think I've told you this, is, um, I wanna clone know me. I really wanna clone her. [00:41:30] And he's like, That's crazy. You can't do that. And I'm sitting here going, Well, I, I to, you know, I'm ready for like, return of no me son, of no me, no. You know, no me's revenge.

Just, I just wanna keep, And he's like, No, you can't wanna know me. That's crazy. Um, but um, it's, we're, we're just so lucky to have them for as long as we do. Yeah.

Terra Newell: You know? Have you seen the Age of Adeline? No. What's. No, it's not. Oh, it's this movie. But she liter, like, she lives forever, [00:42:00] but she keeps getting the same dog over and over again.

Like, oh, a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel and I, I'm not gonna lie, I've had a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, and then I got another one that looked exactly like my old one and named her Chanel, uh, Coco Chanel and the one before with Chanel, just, you know, different Chanels. And the next one will be Chanel, number one.

Number two, you. Number five,

Collier Landry: So now that we feel is my mother's favorite perfume, by the way. . [00:42:30] Mm-hmm. Classic. It's, it is a classic one. So do either of you know of any, um, shelters or resources if people are looking to adopt?

Terra Newell: Yeah. So you can go on Pet Harbor. Mm-hmm. . Um, Think it's pet But if you do a Google search for Pet Harbor, you can go and you can look up any adoptable animals in the area, and you can go and you can choose like Chihuahuas, Border, [00:43:00] Collies, anything like that, and you can look up all the rescues and the dogs that way.

Oh, a, a different,

Lenora Claire: um, resource. I wanna mention really quick too, it's slight, it's slightly different. I just found out about them and they sound really cool. Um, it's called Red Rover and it's, uh, they do a lot. It's, it's to help people who are in crisis, so they don't have to fully give up their animal.

Like, let's just say like you're, there's a hurricane or you're in a domestic violence situation and you're trying to figure your situation out, but you still wanna keep your pet. They'll look after your pet [00:43:30] temporarily until you get into a better situation. Well, that's cool. Yeah. Ever since finding out about that, I'm like, that's, I, I wish, I wish more people knew about that one too, because that's, that's like really specialized and I think a lot of, a lot of animals, Yeah, they end up going to shelters and people are just, they just need like a little help.

They don't, they're not ready to fully surrender their animals. So, um, that's something in between

Collier Landry: as well. I would, I would love to foster a dog eventually, but I feel like I would be a failed foster parent. . Oh, y yeah. Oh

Lenora Claire: yeah. .

Collier Landry: Yeah. . , [00:44:00] but it would be another one and then, then it would just become a habit.


Terra Newell: Are you saying you can end up with 10 dogs? Probably. Oh my gosh. That would be my true. You

Lenora Claire: sort of, Um, it's tricking Mattel from Drag Race. She just took over. Um, a property in Palm Springs, right. So I used to go to the, it used to be called, um, Coral Sands. It was owned by a woman named Ruby Montana.

And she, that was exactly her thing. She would [00:44:30] adopt senior chihuahuas, and so I would go to her motel and there'd be just like, I don't know that so many just, you know, the, the, the cute, the, the toothless, the tongue hanging out Senior chihuahuas in this, like living their best life. And I always thought like, that's what I want for retirement.

I just want a bunch of, just like senior littles, just give me all the, you know, the pins just hanging out with them by a pool. I just thought that was, oh my god, the sweetest thing ever. Um, I always think about that and it just, I love it.

Terra Newell: I can can [00:45:00] see you with min pins. I'll just. Dolly Parton. That would be a great cover photo.


Lenora Claire: Nomi has, Nomi has the doggy Parton dress. She has the, the one that just came out. It's, it's awesome. Yeah.

Terra Newell: Does she have the wig yet,

Lenora Claire: Dolly Parton? Not yet. She has, she only has wigs that look like my hair. Okay. Um, with mushing, it's, it's a clipon bang that I turned into a wig for

Collier Landry: her. I remember I dressed Bondi as the Easter bunny one year, and she was not enthusiastic, but I used to have this great dog sitter when I would travel out of, [00:45:30] That was also a costumer.

So if it was like New Year's or Christmas or Thanksgiving or 4th of July, I would get a photograph of a little custom made outfit for Blondie. I can never get her to wear anything after that Easter Bunny outfit, but . But she would send me photos of her with her little like top hat on for 4th of July with Little Extreme.

Oh my gosh. It was so adorable. Well, ladies, thank you for indulging me on a little doggy talk, and this is a complete divergence normally from what I [00:46:00] discuss on this program. But, um, I adore you both and so, and, and you're both great dog mamas. And, um, and thank you for your support this last few days. And it's been kind of hot.


Lenora Claire: And it, it, if you need anything, we're, we're, we're both here for you, you know.

Collier Landry: Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Um.

Terra Newell: That's, Or if you need a dog, . Um, if you need a dog, need a dog, right? One might just show up at your door anytime. . [00:46:30] Oh boy. I'm not boy, like, no, but like, if you need one, just say the word and then one will show up.


Collier Landry: I know this isn't my usual podcast, uh, fodder, but, um, I just really wanted to just talk with a couple of friends of mine. It's really helping. Process the loss of Blonie because she was such an important and important part of my life, and anyone that's followed me on Instagram or seen my TikTok or just known me [00:47:00] over the years that I, I've had her in my life.

And I just, you know, I, I, I'm so grateful that she came into my life and that she was just, she was amazing. I mean, the dog really saved my life in so many ways. I can't. Uh, express. Um, I will miss her and her little bark in her little when she would snore . [00:47:30] Um, I just loved her to pieces and, um, she will be really, really be missed.

I wanna give a, a special shout out to my dear friend Pamela Willis. Uh, who brought Blondie into my life? Uh, my dear friend Tara Newell, who was there, uh, with me for the end of her life. Uh, my dear friend Holly Jordan, who is a veterinarian here in the Los Angeles area, originally from Ohio, and a Chihuahua mom herself.

She really gave us some really great advice, uh, [00:48:00] towards the end of Blondie's life. She was there for her. Um, and, uh, a shout out to Sherman Oaks Veterinary Group. Uh, they, they did a really, they were. Sensitive. It's, it's, it's tough when you're trying to put a dog down to even get into, put a dog down these days because of the pandemic and because the, the, a lot of these shelters are overcrowded, as we were talking about.

And so I want to thank them for, for their kindness. And, um, I want to thank Blonie for being in my life. [00:48:30] Mm-hmm. . And I will miss her little fuzz face for sure. But I will carry her in my heart. And for those of you watching on YouTube, this is her little. So

anyways, um, I'm Collier Landry, and this is Moving Past Murder. Thanks y'all Blondie! What's going on?[00:49:00]

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